Mother despairs over daughter’s addiction
The first thing Karen wants is for her daughter to acknowledge her addiction, the last, having the police knock at the door asking to identify her body.
For several years Karen’s only daughter, who is in her 20s, has been using P or pure methamphetamine.
The Howick resident, who says situations like hers don’t just happen in low socioeconomic suburbs, is hoping her daughter will get the help she desperately needs.
Her daughter’s erratic behaviour, prostitution, stealing, sleeping for days, change of friends, lying and dramatic weight loss are just some of the things Karen (not her real name) has been forced to come to terms with.
“They say an addict has to hit rock bottom before they begin to deal with it, but I wonder who will fall apart first,” she says.
Even talking about drug use ‘gets her into quite a rage’.
After fearing her own world was caving in on her, Karen joined Community Alcohol and Drug Services (CADS).
“CADS lets you talk about things. For the first few months I couldn’t talk to anyone. There is that pride where you don’t want to let people know what’s happening. I questioned myself, where did I go wrong?” she says.
“It’s an absolute nightmare, it’s frightening what she is putting into her body. You hear people say ‘they must have been on P’ when there has been a murder and you think ‘oh my god, my kid’s on that’.”
Police know she uses methamphetamine and advised Karen to issue her daughter with a trespass notice, but she is concerned her daughter will fall deeper into her destructive lifestyle.
“I want her to realise the reality of the situation before it gets worse.”
Higher Ground Drug Rehabilitation Trust director Stuart Anderson says change in behaviour and attitude, such as becoming agitated, snapping, aggressive behaviour and sleeping odd hours are early signs of a user.
“It doesn’t take long to become addicted to it,” Mr Anderson says.
“Generally anyone addicted to the drug becomes progressively worse and it is not a question of cutting back. Physically the body becomes dependent on it, then psychologically where the individual’s time is taken up on how to get it and how they will use it and then the cycle begins again.”
Drug paraphernalia found in their bedroom or clothing can be another indication of a user.
Smoking pipes, little plastic bags, syringes, light bulbs, straws, glass bottles, tinfoil, candles, lighters and other drugs are signs.
Mr Anderson suggests families contact CADS as soon as possible, where assessing the appropriate need of the person can be decided.
Most participants at Higher Ground are self-referred.
If they do not want help then taking a tough love approach can be beneficial, says Mr Anderson.
“Most drug addicts need to go through some form of crisis before they get help,” he says.
He recommends supporting them if they are getting help rather than feeding their addiction such as giving them money and allowing them to use it in the family home.
“Families need to set limits,” Mr Anderson says.
If someone has been using it for some time they will lose weight, look tried, scratch their skin and generally lack self-care.
“Some people stop taking one drug and use another one. Some need a medical detoxification or need somewhere safe to go to detoxify. By getting help the user will then learn how to cope with social and living skills without the dependency of the drug,” he says.
“If you’re looking at them and saying ‘I don’t recognise this person’, it could be a sign,” Mr Anderson says.
